Disposable Lantern

No matter what age a person is you'll hear them say things like, "Well back when I was growing up..." followed by something that in their view has changed since "they were growing up".  

Well, when I was growing up you could buy a Coleman lantern that, properly cared for, might last nearly a lifetime.  Today, a coleman lantern like the one in this picture has a shelf-life.  If properly cared for you'd be lucky if it last 150 hours of burn time.  No doubt the fine folks at Coleman (and there are some fine folks at Coleman--I've known a few) would take exception to that. However, based on my many years of lantern-experience, they just don't make 'em like they used to.

I suppose that in my lifetime I have owned and operated somewhere in the vicinity of 18 or 20 of these disposable propane lanterns and don't recall even one that's stood the test of time. It's just one country boy's opinion but seems to me a lantern ought to last 50 years or better.

When I was a kid growing up we had a Coleman stove, lantern and camp heater purchased no doubt from Sears and Roebuck, where our Mom worked and received a 10% discount. Most of our store bought stuff came from Sears and camping gear was no different. One exception was a heavy sleeping bag that was procured from Montgomery Ward. I have always assumed that it too came from Sears. Upon closer examination a while back, however, I discovered Montgomery Ward must have had one heck of a sale on sleeping bags sometime in the early spring of 1970 or '71. That's the only reason I can think of that my folks would have bought one of our family sleeping bags from Wards. Dang; that sounds funny to say "Wards". I bet I haven't said Wards in 40 years, at least not in reference to shopping there. As I recollect, Pennys wasn't much into the camping gear bidness when I was growing up. I suspect that was a missed opportunity and one the Penny folks would like to have back. Could have made a difference:)

Anyway, I'm getting tired of throwing these darn lanterns away shortly after they get broken in. They do make decent bird nest holders and that's a consolation. The good people in California would be so proud of me for repurposing these lanterns instead of disposing of them properly aka: pitch them in the trash. No doubt lanterns are known to cause cancer in the state of California so be sure and handle your non-functioning lanterns with care. 

Considering the camping industry is capable of making a sleeping bag that last 50 years they could surely make a lantern that'd last at least that long. I may need to contact Klietus or Nickadimus to do some lantern research and see if there's something better out there. Maybe Coleman still makes a high quality lantern that's just hard to find. I have checked Walmart, Cabellas and even "Amazoneverything" to no avail. But, like anyone who's ever misplaced their car keys, I'll keep looking. Maybe I should give Academy a shot.

"He wanted a .50 caliber: it was only a .30 but daaang...it was a gin-u-ine Coleman...I mean Hawken!" In any event, I'll keep you posted on most things Coleman and some things California.

Post Script: A Barry County, Missouri shout-out to Ain't Dee who turns 14+ in the morrow. Happy Birthday Ain't Dee Dee:)