I know the vast majority of people don't have a Twitter account. As a result, I thought I'd post a selection of tweets from mine. Keep in mind, each Tweet can have a maximum of 140 characters including spaces. That's why some of these are somewhat abbreviated. Here you go:
8 seconds ago: Someone hacked into Fox News and Tweeted false statements about the Pres. They ruled out Biden since he can't even sign on his own acct.
6 minutes ago: Exxon Mobil spilled 1000 barrels of oil into the Yellow Stone River. Would someone please tell the oil companies oil and water don't mix!
39 minutes ago: VP Joe Biden recently joined Twitter. He said he wasn't sure what Twitter is but it sounds really neat!
1 day ago: Apple will soon release I-phone 5. They considered releasing 6, 7, or 8 but decided to continue releasing the phones in numerical sequence.
1 day ago: Venezuelan Pres. Hugo Chavez is recovering after the removal of a cancerous tumor. Doctors r baffled he's able to function without a head.
26 days ago: If it weren't for dishonest politicians, Ellen Pompeo would be president, James Spader would b VP, and congress would not exist.
26 days ago: After much investigation I finally found an honest politician; he's buried in Oak Ridge Cemetery in Springfield, Illinois.
That's a sample for what it's worth. To set up your own Twitter account, go to the "App Store" on your smart phone and down load the 'Twitter' app. Once it's on your phone, just follow the directions. You can find me at "rollarustic" (one word). When you do, click on 'follow'. Within 3 days of signing up to follow me, you will receive something in the mail as a token of my appreciation. It will probably only be the regular kind of stuff you get in the mail, but what do you expect for nothing?
Tuesday, July 5, 2011
Life lesson #3837
Last week I spent 5 days and 4 nights fishing the U.S./Canada boundary waters out of Ely Minnesota with my good friend Tony, his son's Henry and George, and nephew Mitchell (Mitch-Mitch you son of a.....gun!).
Aside from having a great time, I learned how liberating it is to not be bogged down with a lot of stuff.
On the long canoe trip out to our camp site, one of our several large packs of equipment was accidentally left at one of the 2 quarter mile portages, and we didn't know it was missing until we'd completed the nearly 5 hour canoe trip and were setting up camp.
The missing pack contained all of Tony's clothes and personal affects along with all my clothes. My personal affects (toiletries, flashlight, knife, hatchet etc.) were in a separate back pack, but Tony had literally lost everything.
Realizing it could take days to track down the pack combined with the additional fact that we were totally worn out from the canoe trip, we decided to make due with what we had.
Over the course of the next 5 days, I wore the same pair of pants, same shirt, same pair of socks and the same fleece pullover. Thanks to the generosity of my young friend George, I had 1 additional pair of underwear to rotate through; washing and drying one pair each day while wearing the other.
As time passed, I slowly began realizing how nice it was to not have to make choices each morning about what to wear. I saw how less stressful it was to have a very limited quantity of things to keep track of, and by the end of the week, I came to see how little a person might need in order to get by. In short, I got a glimpse at the possibility that having too many possessions might actually complicate living-not make it simpler.
Wednesday, June 22, 2011
Seekonk Adventure
Sue and I are getting ready to head home after 5 fun filled days in the North East. We went with our great friends Scott and Kim to attend Scott's family reunion in Seekonk, Massachusetts. Scott's mother Judy and her man Art were gracious hostess and host and we had a fun time meeting their extended families and touring the greater Seekonk area. Scott showed us the vast majority of his old stomping grounds, however, he didn't have time to show us where he attended band camp or kissed his first girl (he thinks it was a girl).
We spent 24 hours in Boston with Scott, Kim, Max, Courtney & Cole and Zack & Ashley, and while there attended a Red Sox game at storied Fenway Park (I now know why Fenway has the reputation it does and discovered you have to actually go there to understand it).
Boston is one of the most outstanding places I've ever visited and Sue and I are already planning a return trip. It was a nice little adventure.
Lesson confirmed this past week: when good friends invite you to attend their family reunion or some similar family event, of which you technically have no business being at, don't over think it-just say yes and go. It was one of the funnest 5 days we've ever had!
We spent 24 hours in Boston with Scott, Kim, Max, Courtney & Cole and Zack & Ashley, and while there attended a Red Sox game at storied Fenway Park (I now know why Fenway has the reputation it does and discovered you have to actually go there to understand it).
Boston is one of the most outstanding places I've ever visited and Sue and I are already planning a return trip. It was a nice little adventure.
Lesson confirmed this past week: when good friends invite you to attend their family reunion or some similar family event, of which you technically have no business being at, don't over think it-just say yes and go. It was one of the funnest 5 days we've ever had!
Wednesday, June 15, 2011
Measure of a Man
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| ~Our Dad circa 1962 |
My two brothers and I were fortunate to grow up in a family with a Mom and Dad who loved and respected each other and who loved and cared for us. I don't recall my Mom and Dad encouraging us toward achieving greatness or seeking world fame and fortune. I think they had expectations for each of us that were higher than that.
Our parents expected us to do things like respect our elders; always tell the truth; obey the laws; drive safely; to not talk back to our teachers; to finish high school, and either go to college, get a job, or join the military. I'm confident they hoped we wouldn't get a girl pregnant out of wed lock, would stay away from drugs and alcohol, and for sure expected us to never do anything that would result in getting ourselves arrested. The bottom line is, they expected us to give a good effort toward the things that matter, treat people right, and be productive citizens. They didn't just hope for that--they expected it and we knew it.
Our Dad wasn't the kind of dad who routinely sat us down to share his philosophy on life. He didn't spend a lot of time lecturing us on what we should and should not do, nor was he much on giving speeches at family gatherings. Our Dad taught his sons how to be men through his actions more so than through his words. He taught us through visual example, what a man looks like and how a man behaves. And not just on Sundays but every day of the week. He must have known we'd be watching.
I was fortunate to have some other good men around me as I grew up, but I learned most of the real critical stuff about being a man from our Dad. I'm not just talking about how to swing a hammer, shoot a gun, cut a board or make a jig (inside story), although he taught us those things too. I'm referring to the important things we learned by watching our Dad all those years. My brother's and I learned how a man is supposed to treat his wife and what it means to be respectful of women. Let me explain:
In the fall of 1973, my then 16 year old brother "Ace" and I decided to go duck hunting. The spot we chose was over a mile away from our house through the heavily forested oak and hickory woods of the Ozark hills. It was called Bray's Lake, but the local boys knew it simply as Bray's.
It was also deer season and Ace had taken along a few slugs for the old bolt action 12 gauage Dad had traded off Paul Mesplay several years earlier-a guy Dad worked with for years at the Rolla post office.
As we neared the back waters of Bray's, we walked up on 3 deer about 50 yards away. The wind was blowing hard toward us and apparently the deer didn't hear our approach. I'll fast forward in the interest of your time.....
Shortly after my announcement of the return of the prodigal son, Ace arrived home proudly with his prized deer thrown up over his shoulders. Our mutual excitement lasted only as long as it took our mutual parents to discover their eldest son (assisted by their middle son) had illegally harvested a female deer instead of a buck: a buck would have been legal-a doe was not. Needless to say, the overall atmosphere of joy and enthusiasm took an abrupt turn: "What were you thinking"; "What the Sam Hill"; "If this gets out I'll probably go to jail", and finally, "Don't you ever do that again!"
Well, after the dust had settled and my dad had left the room, Mom apparently felt the need to express one last time how she didn't want her eldest son Larry to "ever do that again!"She did and without giving it much thought, Larry shouted back "I WON'T!" Well, to my brother's surprise, Dad walked around the corner at the precise time he'd shouted his response to Mom. Here's where the lesson came in:
In less time that it takes a young cat to pounce on an old mouse, Dad grabbed my fully grown 6 foot tall 180 pound brother up off the ground, pushed him up against the kitchen cabinets (Dad never once mis-treated us or used unreasonable force-he also never bluffed when he said he was going to do something...not once that I remember) and said very firmly and with no room for mis-interpretation, "Don't you ever raise your voice to your Mother--ever!" The next thing my brother knew he was lying belly down over our Dad's knee getting his 16 year old behind "tanned" in what would be the last behind tanning to ever take place in our Rural Route 1 household, as far as I know.
When Dad was done giving his famous black leather belt one last workout (it actually didn't get used very often and when it did Dad didn't swing it all that hard-something I wouldn't fully appreciate until years later when I became a father myself), my brother stood up with as I recall somewhat of a dazed look on his face. Standing toe to toe with my big brother, Dad looked him square in the eye and said very firmly, "I don't care how old you are or how big you get, if you ever talk to your Mother like again I'll whip your behind...do you understand me son?!"
All these years later I can still clearly remember standing there in the living room doorway while that entire operation went down. I recall the look on my brother's face. I remember the pause after Dad stopped talking, and I remember, thinking, "Larry, you'd better say the right thing this time".
Well, my big brother's better judgement kicked in and he responded with what must have been very close to what Dad was looking for, because as quickly as it had started it was over: lesson learned.
Dad told us years later that when he turned Larry over his knee, he thought to himself "Lord don't let this boy turn on me now-he's big enough and strong enough to whip my butt if he decides to!").
As I looked back on this now famous Robertson family episode, I've realized something profound: there in our kitchen on that late fall day in 1973, our Dad explained to his sons on no uncertain terms, his expectation regarding how a young man is supposed to respect his mother. He taught us how it's a man's responsibility to always stand up for his wife or his mother or his daughter. He confirmed beyond a doubt that a man's actions speak louder than his words. He showed us that when circumstances arise calling a man to action, you rise to the occasion. And perhaps most importantly, he taught his impressionable sons that being a man doesn't have nearly as much to do with what you say, as it does with what you do.
Thanks Dad for setting a great example all those years and teaching us what it is to be a man. You guessed right...we were watching.
Happy Fathers Day!
The Rest of The Story
I heard yesterday that some gal named Crystal had decided at the last minute to NOT marry Hugh Hefner. I thought, "Now why would anyone not want to marry Hugh Hefner?". I'm a heterosexual 51 year old man, and if I wasn't already happily married, I might even marry Hugh Hefner.
As you're probably aware, Hugh Hefner is the guy who started Playboy magazine. The only time we ever hear anything about Hugh is on the anniversary of the founding of Play Boy magazine, and usually in 5 year increments (like 25, 40, 50 and so on). I have no idea when Play Boy was founded but on the anniversary they always show Hugh at the Play Boy mansion lying around the swimming pool with a bevy of Play Boy babes scantily clad in swim thongs, sipping mai-tai's and hanging all over Hugh like he's some sort of Greek God. It used to make Hugh look pretty cool, but the older I get the more it seems to just make him look like a dirty old man (not that there's anything wrong with being a dirty old man if you can pull it off).
The thing that caught my ear when I heard Crystal (25 years old) had decided in the eleventh hour to NOT marry Ol' Hugh (who's 86 years old) was, when the news anchor said, "there was no reason given".
Confident it had nothing to do with the fact that this girl (who's only 1 year older than my daughter) finally woke up and realized that although very wealthy, Hugh was nearly 3 1/2 times older than she is, I decided to do a little investigative reporting.
I tracked Crystal down on facebook and just flat out asked her why she decided not to marry Hugh. Just as I suspected, she confirmed that her decision to back out of the marriage to the founder of Play Boy, had NOTHING to do with the fact that her future husband was nearly 3 1/2 times older than her. She decided to back out of the marriage because she finally realized old Hugh was 15 years older.....than her grandpa.
And now you know the rest of the story.
As you're probably aware, Hugh Hefner is the guy who started Playboy magazine. The only time we ever hear anything about Hugh is on the anniversary of the founding of Play Boy magazine, and usually in 5 year increments (like 25, 40, 50 and so on). I have no idea when Play Boy was founded but on the anniversary they always show Hugh at the Play Boy mansion lying around the swimming pool with a bevy of Play Boy babes scantily clad in swim thongs, sipping mai-tai's and hanging all over Hugh like he's some sort of Greek God. It used to make Hugh look pretty cool, but the older I get the more it seems to just make him look like a dirty old man (not that there's anything wrong with being a dirty old man if you can pull it off).
The thing that caught my ear when I heard Crystal (25 years old) had decided in the eleventh hour to NOT marry Ol' Hugh (who's 86 years old) was, when the news anchor said, "there was no reason given".
Confident it had nothing to do with the fact that this girl (who's only 1 year older than my daughter) finally woke up and realized that although very wealthy, Hugh was nearly 3 1/2 times older than she is, I decided to do a little investigative reporting.
I tracked Crystal down on facebook and just flat out asked her why she decided not to marry Hugh. Just as I suspected, she confirmed that her decision to back out of the marriage to the founder of Play Boy, had NOTHING to do with the fact that her future husband was nearly 3 1/2 times older than her. She decided to back out of the marriage because she finally realized old Hugh was 15 years older.....than her grandpa.
And now you know the rest of the story.
Friday, June 10, 2011
You don't get old being a fool
My Uncle Pat died a few years ago at the age of 92. There's an old saying that you don't get old being a fool. Uncle Pat was a testament to that.
He was a prolific reader and largely a self taught man. According to my cousin Vic, it wasn't uncommon for Uncle Pat to read a book a day. Although Uncle Pat didn't say a lot, when he did, you listened. He was the Merrill Lynch of our family. The only extravagant thing Uncle Pat and Aunt Katherine ever did as far as I know, was buy a new Buick every couple of years, whether they needed it or not. Other than that, they kept things pretty simple (for example, they lived in the same 1000 square foot house for over 50 years).
The one thing Uncle Pat was always concerned about, was the fear of living through another economic depression. He lived through the first one and apparently didn't like it. He always told my Dad, that to protect yourself against going hungry in the event of a repeat of 1929, you needed to own things of "real value" as apposed to stocks and bonds. Stocks aren't worth much if the entity behind the stock goes out of business and bonds are only good for starting a camp fire if the issuer of the bond can't pay you back for the money you loaned them (paraphrasing here-I wasn't privy to the actual conversations).
Bottom line: I think he was right. I also sense strongly that our country is not going to be able to print it's way out of debt. I'm no financial genius but the fact that our country has over $14 trillion in debt and has, for years now, been spending more than they take in, points to a financial disaster the likes of which none of us has ever seen. I don't normally buy into the prognostications of those who preach doom and gloom. I'm actually not buying into it now. But on a common sense level, I don't see anything related to our economy that tells me things are going to get better, without making radicle changes to the way we do business as a nation.
If for the past several years, you've been spending substantially more than you earn (government spending versus tax revenue); if you have racked up more debt than you could ever possibly pay back (14 trillion and growing by the second-no possible way to ever pay this off) and if you don't have a way of generating an income above your current pay check (the maximum amount you can tax the people is 100%), then at some point you're going belly up. And if you go belly up, it will be years before anyone is ever going to take you at your word that you'll pay them back if they'll loan you money like they used to back before you went belly up eg: China and other countries buying US Treasury Notes and similar debt instruments from our government on the hopes that they'll eventually get their money back.
I think we'd all be wise to focus on paying off what ever debt we might have, and while we're doing that, learn to live on less than we make. We might also be well served to think about how we're going to buy groceries if the value of our currency continues to decline, to the potential point of being worthless. They don't call that a depression-they call it a total financial collapse (just like personal bankruptcy-only worse).
Whether or not things get better or keep getting worse, it looks like Uncle Pat was right; we need to own things that have an actual value, so we're never in a position of having to stand in a soup line or live in an old bus.
Thanks Uncle Pat for passing along your wisdom. You didn't get old being a fool!
He was a prolific reader and largely a self taught man. According to my cousin Vic, it wasn't uncommon for Uncle Pat to read a book a day. Although Uncle Pat didn't say a lot, when he did, you listened. He was the Merrill Lynch of our family. The only extravagant thing Uncle Pat and Aunt Katherine ever did as far as I know, was buy a new Buick every couple of years, whether they needed it or not. Other than that, they kept things pretty simple (for example, they lived in the same 1000 square foot house for over 50 years).
The one thing Uncle Pat was always concerned about, was the fear of living through another economic depression. He lived through the first one and apparently didn't like it. He always told my Dad, that to protect yourself against going hungry in the event of a repeat of 1929, you needed to own things of "real value" as apposed to stocks and bonds. Stocks aren't worth much if the entity behind the stock goes out of business and bonds are only good for starting a camp fire if the issuer of the bond can't pay you back for the money you loaned them (paraphrasing here-I wasn't privy to the actual conversations).
Bottom line: I think he was right. I also sense strongly that our country is not going to be able to print it's way out of debt. I'm no financial genius but the fact that our country has over $14 trillion in debt and has, for years now, been spending more than they take in, points to a financial disaster the likes of which none of us has ever seen. I don't normally buy into the prognostications of those who preach doom and gloom. I'm actually not buying into it now. But on a common sense level, I don't see anything related to our economy that tells me things are going to get better, without making radicle changes to the way we do business as a nation.
If for the past several years, you've been spending substantially more than you earn (government spending versus tax revenue); if you have racked up more debt than you could ever possibly pay back (14 trillion and growing by the second-no possible way to ever pay this off) and if you don't have a way of generating an income above your current pay check (the maximum amount you can tax the people is 100%), then at some point you're going belly up. And if you go belly up, it will be years before anyone is ever going to take you at your word that you'll pay them back if they'll loan you money like they used to back before you went belly up eg: China and other countries buying US Treasury Notes and similar debt instruments from our government on the hopes that they'll eventually get their money back.
I think we'd all be wise to focus on paying off what ever debt we might have, and while we're doing that, learn to live on less than we make. We might also be well served to think about how we're going to buy groceries if the value of our currency continues to decline, to the potential point of being worthless. They don't call that a depression-they call it a total financial collapse (just like personal bankruptcy-only worse).
Whether or not things get better or keep getting worse, it looks like Uncle Pat was right; we need to own things that have an actual value, so we're never in a position of having to stand in a soup line or live in an old bus.
Thanks Uncle Pat for passing along your wisdom. You didn't get old being a fool!
Wednesday, June 8, 2011
Weiner Wows
Is there no limit to the ridiculous things our elected officials will do. I'm sure there must be at least a few of these folks who aren't complete Goobers, but all signs point to the apparent fact that most of them are just not very smart.
I've told our kids ever since they were little, that the only thing they'll ever have that can't be "taken" from them, is their integrity. Anthony Weiner, the congressman from New York, is saying he "will not resign" his position as a United States Congressman. It's hard to imagine how anyone could have that much arrogance in the face of having put themselves in such a humiliating situation. I've thought it over and the only thing I can come up with regarding his motivation for not stepping down and running for the hills is: he has nothing left to lose.
I've told our kids ever since they were little, that the only thing they'll ever have that can't be "taken" from them, is their integrity. Anthony Weiner, the congressman from New York, is saying he "will not resign" his position as a United States Congressman. It's hard to imagine how anyone could have that much arrogance in the face of having put themselves in such a humiliating situation. I've thought it over and the only thing I can come up with regarding his motivation for not stepping down and running for the hills is: he has nothing left to lose.
Monday, June 6, 2011
Set Me Straight
I received some very direct and straightforward communication from a friend I hold in very high regard, concerning my previous post, "Don't forget the Circus Little People".
This friend shared their view on the overall subject of sexual orientation. That individual was completely respectful to me but let me know on straightforward terms how they felt about the blog in question. For clarification, in the post "Don't forget the Circus Little People", I was expressing my disdain for the people who are leading our government who consistently and continually spend their time and our money focussing on things that are not critical to all Americans. I don't ever want to be disrespectful or hurtful to anyone (and I'm sincere on this). I've actually changed my view substantially on the subject of sexual orientation over the last few years. I don't have a problem with individuals who are gay or for that matter, with the gay community as a whole. The thing I have a huge issue with (I hope we all do), is the fact that the leaders of our government too often focus on things that affect relatively small groups of folks or special interest groups. Here's a list of things that affect all Americans, regardless of color, height, sexual orientation, age, gender, political affiliation, fiscal views and so on:
-The 2 wars we're fighting
-The economy
-The +14 trillion dollar debt that's growing daily
-The fact that our government is "broke" and continues spending dramatically more than they're takin in
-The border problem between America and Mexico (not to mention the drug problem)
-Rampent inflation (check the prices on stuff you buy all the time at your favorite stores and compare them to what you paid 2 years ago)
-Our lackluster educational system, and the list goes on and on
I really don't want to spend any of my time writing about this stuff (I'd rather write about 'The Rolla Boys' or make fun of celebrities) and you don't want to spend your time reading it. The one thing I bet all of us agree on is, the boys and girls on the hill need to fix the huge things that affect us all, before they spend their time and our money on things that primarily affect individual groups.
For the record, I don't feel even the Boy Scouts deserve any special considerations until our elected Goobers can at least figure out how to not spend more money than they take in.
This friend shared their view on the overall subject of sexual orientation. That individual was completely respectful to me but let me know on straightforward terms how they felt about the blog in question. For clarification, in the post "Don't forget the Circus Little People", I was expressing my disdain for the people who are leading our government who consistently and continually spend their time and our money focussing on things that are not critical to all Americans. I don't ever want to be disrespectful or hurtful to anyone (and I'm sincere on this). I've actually changed my view substantially on the subject of sexual orientation over the last few years. I don't have a problem with individuals who are gay or for that matter, with the gay community as a whole. The thing I have a huge issue with (I hope we all do), is the fact that the leaders of our government too often focus on things that affect relatively small groups of folks or special interest groups. Here's a list of things that affect all Americans, regardless of color, height, sexual orientation, age, gender, political affiliation, fiscal views and so on:
-The 2 wars we're fighting
-The economy
-The +14 trillion dollar debt that's growing daily
-The fact that our government is "broke" and continues spending dramatically more than they're takin in
-The border problem between America and Mexico (not to mention the drug problem)
-Rampent inflation (check the prices on stuff you buy all the time at your favorite stores and compare them to what you paid 2 years ago)
-Our lackluster educational system, and the list goes on and on
I really don't want to spend any of my time writing about this stuff (I'd rather write about 'The Rolla Boys' or make fun of celebrities) and you don't want to spend your time reading it. The one thing I bet all of us agree on is, the boys and girls on the hill need to fix the huge things that affect us all, before they spend their time and our money on things that primarily affect individual groups.
For the record, I don't feel even the Boy Scouts deserve any special considerations until our elected Goobers can at least figure out how to not spend more money than they take in.
Sunday, June 5, 2011
Don't forget the Circus Little People
In light of the obvious fact that our President, his administration and the vast majority of his followers don't want any group, regardless of overall size, to feel less than fully appreciated (remember-he declared June "GLBT" month-or something very close to that), I have an idea I think he and his administration will be able to get behind: lets dedicate the entire month of July to Circus Midgets!
Now please don't get me wrong-I have absolutely nothing against Circus Midgets (although I must be forthcoming that as a young child the fear of one living under my bed did give me nightmares on more than one occasion). I also have absolutely nothing against anyone who feels they fall into the category of GLB or T-especially the G's, L's and T's (I have to admit here I just can't relate in any way shape of form to the B's-that's just flat weird and twisted in my book). I just think it's ridiculous that we have become so overly concerned about everyones individual feelings (everyone except Christians, Jews, supporters of the 2nd amendment, pro-lifers, people with common sense, capitalist, heterosexuals (especially if your white) people against big and far reaching government, and anyone else who doesn't fall into any of the myriad official minority groups, just to name a few).
We need to grow back up and be more like the people Tom Brokaw refers to as "The Greatest Generation". We need to try real hard to limit the ridiculous things we do and declare. We need to allow people to feel good/bad about themselves all on their own, without interference from our elected officials. We need to stop being a bunch of babies. If all the adults continue to be "ascared" of so many silly things, who's going to raise all these kids-the T's (not that there's anything wrong with that)?
PS. Spank me-just don't forget to call me for supper!
Now please don't get me wrong-I have absolutely nothing against Circus Midgets (although I must be forthcoming that as a young child the fear of one living under my bed did give me nightmares on more than one occasion). I also have absolutely nothing against anyone who feels they fall into the category of GLB or T-especially the G's, L's and T's (I have to admit here I just can't relate in any way shape of form to the B's-that's just flat weird and twisted in my book). I just think it's ridiculous that we have become so overly concerned about everyones individual feelings (everyone except Christians, Jews, supporters of the 2nd amendment, pro-lifers, people with common sense, capitalist, heterosexuals (especially if your white) people against big and far reaching government, and anyone else who doesn't fall into any of the myriad official minority groups, just to name a few).
We need to grow back up and be more like the people Tom Brokaw refers to as "The Greatest Generation". We need to try real hard to limit the ridiculous things we do and declare. We need to allow people to feel good/bad about themselves all on their own, without interference from our elected officials. We need to stop being a bunch of babies. If all the adults continue to be "ascared" of so many silly things, who's going to raise all these kids-the T's (not that there's anything wrong with that)?
PS. Spank me-just don't forget to call me for supper!
Saturday, June 4, 2011
What's in a name.
When I first read about the Congressman Anthony Weiner debacle, I thought to myself, "Surely this cannot be true: you'd have to have a major screw loose to take a picture like that of yourself and store it on your smart phone (unless your name is Lenny and you're like 13). Surely no member of the United States Congress is that naive: that ignorant.
Then the report went on to claim (and later confirm) the picture in question was sent to a 21 year old female college student...a 21 year old! One of the individuals who had been elected to the United States Congress by the people of the great state of New York, took a picture of himself naked and texted it to a 21 year old college co-ed: ARE YOU SERIOUS!
The side fact that this guy's last name is Weiner, confirmed that aside from having the judgement of a 13 year old boy, he is apparently a glutton for punishment if not a complete and utter sadomasicist. And while none of this is against the law as far as I know, we should all ask ourselves, "How do we continue electing these kinds of folks to run our country?" I can understand why someone of this caliber might be hired to appear on certain TV shows like Jerry Springer or Oprah, but Congress...seriously!
Where are guys and gals like Paul Harvey and Barbara Bush when you need them.
Then the report went on to claim (and later confirm) the picture in question was sent to a 21 year old female college student...a 21 year old! One of the individuals who had been elected to the United States Congress by the people of the great state of New York, took a picture of himself naked and texted it to a 21 year old college co-ed: ARE YOU SERIOUS!
The side fact that this guy's last name is Weiner, confirmed that aside from having the judgement of a 13 year old boy, he is apparently a glutton for punishment if not a complete and utter sadomasicist. And while none of this is against the law as far as I know, we should all ask ourselves, "How do we continue electing these kinds of folks to run our country?" I can understand why someone of this caliber might be hired to appear on certain TV shows like Jerry Springer or Oprah, but Congress...seriously!
Where are guys and gals like Paul Harvey and Barbara Bush when you need them.
Friday, June 3, 2011
WWFDRD?
When I read this morning that President Obama had declared June, "Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual & Transgender Pride Month", I was not surprised (I bet you thought I was going to say I was surprised). I was not surprised because of the results of the "comparative greatness test" I give our Presidents now and then. It goes like this:
Compared to previous presidents who history shows overall as having done a good job, how's our current one doing? Specifically, I ask questions like, "What would George, Abe, Franklin, Harry or Dwight have done? Imagine the below scenario:
Time: 7:15 a.m.
Date: May 15, 1942
Place: Oval Office
President Roosevelt has been sitting at his desk since 3:15 that morning. He sits in his wheel chair going through stacks of paper and intellegence reports containing the latest information on the war in Euorope and the war in the Pacific. He hasn't slept well in over 5 years-ever since reports began coming in about a lunitic in Germany who was massing a vast army of killing drones and buying up large quantities of tattoo ink. In walks Vice President Harry Truman and chief of staff Groucho Marks (I don't know who FDR's chief of staff was in May, 1942, so I'll go with Groucho).
Truman: "Mr. President, Groucho has a declaration here he'd like you to sign. One of the California Reps came up with it and Groucho thinks it's a good idea. He needs your signature this morning so the ladies at Flag-Mart will have time to make up the necessary quantity of flags."
FDR: "Alright, but make it fast-we've got a couple of wars we're trying to fight here and a lot more people could die if I'm not able to stay focussed on things that really matter."
Truman: "OK Groucho, make it fast."
Groucho: Placing a document on the Presidents desk, next to his huge stack of critical reports says, "Just sign right here Mr. President and we'll make this thing happen!"
FDR: After reading the proclamation with a befuddled look on his face, the President ask; "What the hell is a 'transgender'? You know I'm well aware of what a lesbian is and I have a feeling what bisexual might mean, but what in the name of General George S. Patton is a transgender!"
Groucho: "Well Mr. President, that's a man who wants to be a woman or a woman who wants to be a man."
FDR: "Assuming your not $&#*ing with me here, and I hope you are, you want me to set aside the entire month of June to 'celebrate' a group of people who, regardless of how I might feel about it personally, must surely comprise a miniscule percentage of the overall population. And assuming I thought this was a great idea, and I don't, wouldn't it make more sense to dedicate the month of June to, oh, I don't know, maybe people who have never been convicted of a felony, or have never abused a child, or all the folks who are not addicted to illegal drugs, or who immigrated to our country legally. How about a week to honor parents who always know where their kids are and what they're up to, or men who have never been unfaithful to their wives, or wives who are always faithful to their husbands. I know, how about we honor bank tellers who call you by name, or store clerks who count back change, or companies that make products in America even though it would be cheaper to make them outside the US, or news anchors who just report the news instead of giving you their personal spin on everything, or newspapers who get most of the facts right, or maybe toddlers who stop pooping their pants once they realize it's not a good idea to run around with poop in their pants, or Boy Scouts who help little old ladies across the street and promise to do their duty, or lawyers who will only represent people who tell the truth or maybe dogs: you know, man's best friend. Hey, maybe we should have a month for circus midgets....now there's a group of under appreciated folks who deserve a month. Crap, why not give Circus Midgets 2 months? Are you stinking kidding me Groucho...you stupid Jackass!".
I could go on but you probably get the point by now.
In 1914, President Woodrow Wilson signed a proclamation that would dedicate 1 day each year to honor mothers. In 2011, President Barack Obama signed a proclamation that dedicates an entire month to honor and celebrate a relatively small group of people because of their sexual orientation.
When President Wilson declared Mother's Day official in the Spring of 1914, we were only days away from the official beginning of World War I.
As President Obama declared June "Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual and Transgender Pride Month", we're fighting at least 2 wars, are in the middle of the greatest economic depression since the 30's, and are being governed by a group of boys and girls who have us, the hard working tax payers, in debt to the tune of over 14 trillion dollars-soon to be over 16 trillion.
If someone in FDR's administration would have ask him to sign a "GLBT Pride Month" declaration in the summer of 1942, I wonder what he would have done?
Compared to previous presidents who history shows overall as having done a good job, how's our current one doing? Specifically, I ask questions like, "What would George, Abe, Franklin, Harry or Dwight have done? Imagine the below scenario:
Time: 7:15 a.m.
Date: May 15, 1942
Place: Oval Office
President Roosevelt has been sitting at his desk since 3:15 that morning. He sits in his wheel chair going through stacks of paper and intellegence reports containing the latest information on the war in Euorope and the war in the Pacific. He hasn't slept well in over 5 years-ever since reports began coming in about a lunitic in Germany who was massing a vast army of killing drones and buying up large quantities of tattoo ink. In walks Vice President Harry Truman and chief of staff Groucho Marks (I don't know who FDR's chief of staff was in May, 1942, so I'll go with Groucho).
Truman: "Mr. President, Groucho has a declaration here he'd like you to sign. One of the California Reps came up with it and Groucho thinks it's a good idea. He needs your signature this morning so the ladies at Flag-Mart will have time to make up the necessary quantity of flags."
FDR: "Alright, but make it fast-we've got a couple of wars we're trying to fight here and a lot more people could die if I'm not able to stay focussed on things that really matter."
Truman: "OK Groucho, make it fast."
Groucho: Placing a document on the Presidents desk, next to his huge stack of critical reports says, "Just sign right here Mr. President and we'll make this thing happen!"
FDR: After reading the proclamation with a befuddled look on his face, the President ask; "What the hell is a 'transgender'? You know I'm well aware of what a lesbian is and I have a feeling what bisexual might mean, but what in the name of General George S. Patton is a transgender!"
Groucho: "Well Mr. President, that's a man who wants to be a woman or a woman who wants to be a man."
FDR: "Assuming your not $&#*ing with me here, and I hope you are, you want me to set aside the entire month of June to 'celebrate' a group of people who, regardless of how I might feel about it personally, must surely comprise a miniscule percentage of the overall population. And assuming I thought this was a great idea, and I don't, wouldn't it make more sense to dedicate the month of June to, oh, I don't know, maybe people who have never been convicted of a felony, or have never abused a child, or all the folks who are not addicted to illegal drugs, or who immigrated to our country legally. How about a week to honor parents who always know where their kids are and what they're up to, or men who have never been unfaithful to their wives, or wives who are always faithful to their husbands. I know, how about we honor bank tellers who call you by name, or store clerks who count back change, or companies that make products in America even though it would be cheaper to make them outside the US, or news anchors who just report the news instead of giving you their personal spin on everything, or newspapers who get most of the facts right, or maybe toddlers who stop pooping their pants once they realize it's not a good idea to run around with poop in their pants, or Boy Scouts who help little old ladies across the street and promise to do their duty, or lawyers who will only represent people who tell the truth or maybe dogs: you know, man's best friend. Hey, maybe we should have a month for circus midgets....now there's a group of under appreciated folks who deserve a month. Crap, why not give Circus Midgets 2 months? Are you stinking kidding me Groucho...you stupid Jackass!".
I could go on but you probably get the point by now.
In 1914, President Woodrow Wilson signed a proclamation that would dedicate 1 day each year to honor mothers. In 2011, President Barack Obama signed a proclamation that dedicates an entire month to honor and celebrate a relatively small group of people because of their sexual orientation.
When President Wilson declared Mother's Day official in the Spring of 1914, we were only days away from the official beginning of World War I.
As President Obama declared June "Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual and Transgender Pride Month", we're fighting at least 2 wars, are in the middle of the greatest economic depression since the 30's, and are being governed by a group of boys and girls who have us, the hard working tax payers, in debt to the tune of over 14 trillion dollars-soon to be over 16 trillion.
If someone in FDR's administration would have ask him to sign a "GLBT Pride Month" declaration in the summer of 1942, I wonder what he would have done?
Wednesday, June 1, 2011
It doesn't take an expert
We are in dire economic times and you don't have to be Allen Greenspan or Ben Bernanke to figure it out. Unless these 2 guys are complete and total financial goobers, they, along with the other so called experts on the economy, know we are no longer headed down the road to financial distruction as a Nation-we're at the end of the road. I'm no expert, but I have a strong gut feeling we're going to have a repeat of what happened in 2008 when the finacial snot hit the proverbial fan. Only this time, our government won't be able to borrow money from our friends in China and hand it out to the citizenry fast enough to stave off the inevitable overall financial correction that surly must take place before we can get our overall financial house in order as a nation. More banks will have to fail, more huge and poorly managed companies will have to go out of business, and more individual Americans will have to rely on their generous neighbors to feed and house them until they can find another job. Those who wait around for their state and federal governments to bail them out, will be waiting for a night in shining armor who doesn't exist.
Lastly, if you're thinking about borrowing money for something you don't actually need, you might be better off trying to enjoy life with the things you already have. Borrowing money to buy something you don't need when there's a possibility you soon may no longer have the means to make the payments, must surly feel like entering a beauty contest, when you know you're ugly--in the long run, your chances of winning are slim.
Lastly, if you're thinking about borrowing money for something you don't actually need, you might be better off trying to enjoy life with the things you already have. Borrowing money to buy something you don't need when there's a possibility you soon may no longer have the means to make the payments, must surly feel like entering a beauty contest, when you know you're ugly--in the long run, your chances of winning are slim.
Friday, May 20, 2011
Missing the point
I've seen a substantial increase over the past few years in the number of folks out riding their bikes, going for a walk, or running for exercise along the numerous trails in North West Arknasas, built just for those type activities. The thing about this I find most interesting, is the number of these folks who are plugged into some sort of listening device (mostly I-pods I'm sure).
Although I can understand the strategy of listening to your favorite music if you're training to run in the Olympics (as a guy who used to run for exercise before I discovered jumping rope is substantially more affective) I get the music thing. But going out for a walk or a bike ride and not being able to hear the sounds of everything around you, seems to go against the point of being outside in the first place. Seems to me, if you're listeing the Snoop Dog, Fiddy Cent or Common rant and rave about stuff that for the most part doesn't make any sense in the first place, you can't fully enjoy the sites, smells and sounds of the great outdoors.
Although I can understand the strategy of listening to your favorite music if you're training to run in the Olympics (as a guy who used to run for exercise before I discovered jumping rope is substantially more affective) I get the music thing. But going out for a walk or a bike ride and not being able to hear the sounds of everything around you, seems to go against the point of being outside in the first place. Seems to me, if you're listeing the Snoop Dog, Fiddy Cent or Common rant and rave about stuff that for the most part doesn't make any sense in the first place, you can't fully enjoy the sites, smells and sounds of the great outdoors.
Is a dog right for you?
If you don't have a dog, you might consider getting one. There's no need to go into all the reason's why dogs make such great companions-you've read all the email cliches, watchced at least 40 Youtube dog videos and have probably read at least part of 1 of the thousands of books written about dogs. But cliches are cliches for a reason-most of them reflect reality. Simply put, a dog's apparent only expectations of it's master is that you feed it, pet it ocassionally, and let it lay around some place in your general vacinity (I had a girlfriend once that fit that description-I wonder what ever happened to her).
For most dog lovers, these basic aspects of nurturing come naturally. If you're thinking about getting a dog but aren't confident you can consistantly provide these 3 basic dog benefits, don't get a dog. If you still feel the need to have a non-judgemental companion however, you should definitely run up to Walmart and get an artificial plant.
PS. As I'm writing this, my friendly canine companion Max is lying in his dog bed by the back door, waiting to see if he gets to go for a ride today in the "Max Mobile"-a 2002 Chevy Tahoe with a mere 207,000 miles to it's credit. He's already eaten breakfast and has been petted at least 3 times, so the rest of his day is gravy!
For most dog lovers, these basic aspects of nurturing come naturally. If you're thinking about getting a dog but aren't confident you can consistantly provide these 3 basic dog benefits, don't get a dog. If you still feel the need to have a non-judgemental companion however, you should definitely run up to Walmart and get an artificial plant.
PS. As I'm writing this, my friendly canine companion Max is lying in his dog bed by the back door, waiting to see if he gets to go for a ride today in the "Max Mobile"-a 2002 Chevy Tahoe with a mere 207,000 miles to it's credit. He's already eaten breakfast and has been petted at least 3 times, so the rest of his day is gravy!
Saturday, May 14, 2011
Hey, hey we're the Monkies!
The early 70's Saturday morning TV show 'The Monkies' is retro proof positive people will watch what ever kind of junk the networks decide to put in front of them (hard to believe the net-work execs thought that would be a good idea-"Hey, let's find 4 average looking Goobers with not much real talent and make a ridiculous 30 minute Saturday morning TV show that kids will watch. It'll work as long as one of them has a British accent and....." etc etc).
Growing up in Rolla in the 60's and 70's, we had an excuse for watching that kind of stuff: we only had 2 TV channels and sometimes only 1, depending on the weather.
KMOU TV-8 out of Springfield (an ABC affiliate) had some decent shows like 'Danial Boone', 'Wild Kingdom', and 'Ricochet Rabbit', but wasn't reliable for watchable reception. For some reason, KOMU showed up on our "set" on both channel 8 and 3. Ocassionally, we'd switch from channel 8 to 3 and pretend we had 3 channels to choose from instead of just up to 2.
Regardless of the time of day or the weather, we could always count on good reception from good old KRCG TV-13, a CBS affiliate out of Jefferson City, Mo (Jeff if you were a local). KRCG carried all the real good cartoons like 'The Jetsons' and 'The Flintstones' (the real Jetsons and Flintstones-not the ones you watch today with the voice folks who sound kind of like the originals), along with shows like 'Mannix', 'All In The Family', and 'Gunsmoke'.
When we faked being sick and stayed home from school, we could watch game shows like 'The Price Is Right', 'Hollywood Squares' and 'The $10,000 pyriamid' ($10,000 back then was about the average annual salary of people who had a good job). You could also watch the nightly news with Walter Cronkite and once a week or so, a 2 hour movie like 'The Birds' or 'The African Queen'.
Although it would have been nice while we were growing up to have had a few hundred choices for TV viewing like we have today, I'm glad we didn't. If we had, I might never have learned how to throw a baseball, ride a bike, or play Red Light Green Light. I'm sure I would never have been involved with the neighborhood kids in digging underground forts, damming up the creek or chopping down trees to build a log cabin. And with several hundred TV channels at our disposal, I'm sure my friends and I would never have found the time to carry that old toilet all the way up the road to set it on Mackman's front porch, ring the door bell, and run like scalded dogs for the safety of the near-by woods. And had we been inside all day and night watching TV, the Mackmen's probably wouldn't be thinking today, "I wonder what ever happened to those little bastards who lived down the road and left that old toilet on our front porch that time? They're probably in prison....watching old re-runs of 'The Monkies'"!
Growing up in Rolla in the 60's and 70's, we had an excuse for watching that kind of stuff: we only had 2 TV channels and sometimes only 1, depending on the weather.
KMOU TV-8 out of Springfield (an ABC affiliate) had some decent shows like 'Danial Boone', 'Wild Kingdom', and 'Ricochet Rabbit', but wasn't reliable for watchable reception. For some reason, KOMU showed up on our "set" on both channel 8 and 3. Ocassionally, we'd switch from channel 8 to 3 and pretend we had 3 channels to choose from instead of just up to 2.
Regardless of the time of day or the weather, we could always count on good reception from good old KRCG TV-13, a CBS affiliate out of Jefferson City, Mo (Jeff if you were a local). KRCG carried all the real good cartoons like 'The Jetsons' and 'The Flintstones' (the real Jetsons and Flintstones-not the ones you watch today with the voice folks who sound kind of like the originals), along with shows like 'Mannix', 'All In The Family', and 'Gunsmoke'.
When we faked being sick and stayed home from school, we could watch game shows like 'The Price Is Right', 'Hollywood Squares' and 'The $10,000 pyriamid' ($10,000 back then was about the average annual salary of people who had a good job). You could also watch the nightly news with Walter Cronkite and once a week or so, a 2 hour movie like 'The Birds' or 'The African Queen'.
Although it would have been nice while we were growing up to have had a few hundred choices for TV viewing like we have today, I'm glad we didn't. If we had, I might never have learned how to throw a baseball, ride a bike, or play Red Light Green Light. I'm sure I would never have been involved with the neighborhood kids in digging underground forts, damming up the creek or chopping down trees to build a log cabin. And with several hundred TV channels at our disposal, I'm sure my friends and I would never have found the time to carry that old toilet all the way up the road to set it on Mackman's front porch, ring the door bell, and run like scalded dogs for the safety of the near-by woods. And had we been inside all day and night watching TV, the Mackmen's probably wouldn't be thinking today, "I wonder what ever happened to those little bastards who lived down the road and left that old toilet on our front porch that time? They're probably in prison....watching old re-runs of 'The Monkies'"!
Sunday, May 1, 2011
Attention Deficit Disorder?
Warning to men who grew up before they discovered attention deficit disorder, and are not currently on medication.
If you're in the neighborhood of 50 and don't want to suffer the same recent fate as one unfortunate man from Gravette, Arkansas, listen up and heed the warning to "Stay focussed man!";
This guy's wife sent him to Walmart for some BBQ'd potato chips and a couple boxes of Little Debbies. Like a lot of guys our age, he got side tracked when he saw a sign advertising a "2 for 1" special on Dilly Bars at Dairy Queen. He got home a couple hours later to discover his wife had given him up for dead and remarried.
Not all was lost, however-he said the Dilly Bars were "Really good!".
If you're in the neighborhood of 50 and don't want to suffer the same recent fate as one unfortunate man from Gravette, Arkansas, listen up and heed the warning to "Stay focussed man!";
This guy's wife sent him to Walmart for some BBQ'd potato chips and a couple boxes of Little Debbies. Like a lot of guys our age, he got side tracked when he saw a sign advertising a "2 for 1" special on Dilly Bars at Dairy Queen. He got home a couple hours later to discover his wife had given him up for dead and remarried.
Not all was lost, however-he said the Dilly Bars were "Really good!".
Wednesday, April 27, 2011
Did it really happen that way?
I'm was beginning to wonder whether or not anything I remembered from my childhood, actually ever happened. For example: I received a BB gun for Christmas when I was 5 or 6, and I vividly remember walking around our yard "all by myself" with my BB gun shooting birds (not acceptable today). I know I was 6 because we moved off the farm when I was 6 and that's where I remember shooting the BB gun "all by myself".
I was telling this story a while back and my Mom said, "Oh Russell, we did not let you shoot your BB gun all by yourself when you were 6 years old!" I told her I knew for sure I had because I could remember it like it was yesterday. She maintained there was "no way" her and Dad would have let us shoot our BB guns all by ourselves when we were 6 years old.
I began questioning everything I thought I remembered from my early years, when I was struck by the following thought: maybe Mom's the one who doesn't remember. Suddenly, I felt much better about the accuracy of my recall!
I was telling this story a while back and my Mom said, "Oh Russell, we did not let you shoot your BB gun all by yourself when you were 6 years old!" I told her I knew for sure I had because I could remember it like it was yesterday. She maintained there was "no way" her and Dad would have let us shoot our BB guns all by ourselves when we were 6 years old.
I began questioning everything I thought I remembered from my early years, when I was struck by the following thought: maybe Mom's the one who doesn't remember. Suddenly, I felt much better about the accuracy of my recall!
Donald Trump
Dandy Don Trump told reporters the other day he bought a house for $41 million and sold it a "short time later" for over $100 million. Sorry Donald, this is not a good reason for us to elect you as our next President. Our current and previous President have done way better than that with increasing the deficit. When you show us you can take $41 million and turn it into say, a few billion, then we'll talk!
Hot off the press!
Just in from the Federal Reserve: According to Ben and the boys, a billion is the new million. Thanks Ben for giving us all something to feel good about!
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